 
This Strain Review was written by Jason Reed for issue 4 of  ISMOKE Magazine. You can view the full issue online here,  view it on your mobile phone here or  download the pdf to your pc/mac here (right  click, save target as).
 Can you remember the bear?  That bear?  “Follow the bear”?  Have I  lost you already?  Older readers may be aware of a certain advert that  portrayed a rather groovy looking bear that promoted a certain alcoholic  drink.  It was huge at the time, just as big as Jack Dee’s “Widget”  campaign for John Smith’s bitter… remember that one?  Please don’t make  me sing the song as it was the literal definition of an earworm.  Oh ok,  it went like this:
  
 “Widget, it’s got a widget, a lovely widget, a widget it has  got…”
  
 You had to be there I think.  It was catchy, we all sang it.  It was  rumoured that it was going to replace God Save The Queen as the national  anthem.
  
 Ok, another advert?  How about the cigar ads?  Cult classics such as  Panama Cigars -  “Happiness is a cigar called Panama” - or  Hamlet, I don’t know, shows it didn’t work on me.  The campaign depicted  an arduous task that was made all the better for having a nice cigar.   Bill Clinton of course went on to take this concept literally.  An  obvious gag you’ll agree, but I couldn’t leave it hanging – ironically;  that’s what he said too.  Moving on.
  
 Why am I getting nostalgic on you?  Why the halcyon look at  yesteryear?  I bet I drink Carling Black Label?  Peter Kay and his  infamous set of John Smith ads?  The list of good advertising campaigns  is as endless as the liver transplant list.
  
 Think of these ads in a different way though, imagine cocaine was  being pushed by the nations favourite comedians, or a cosy bear was  peddling heroin; follow the bear and shoot up?  Just doesn’t cut the  mustard really does it?  Logically and laterally; there is no real  difference between attaching a fancy strap line and gimmicks to these  substances over alcohol and tobacco, it’s fundamentally still pushing  drugs.  So why is one allowed but the other is simply shocking to  conceive?  Although, I must admit, I think an LSD ad campaign would be  something to behold!  Imagine the notion of an LSD Unicorn as national  logo?  In fact, I bagsy that idea, copyright, all rights reserved to  Outlaw!
  
  
  
 To correct my deviation, why is one form of drug pushing allowed  whilst less harmful substances must be brushed under the carpet, and  indeed, any discussion is forbidden.  We’re not even allowed to speak of  any other drug; Debra Bell once said that any time you mention  cannabis, a fairy dies.
  
 One word gives free license to hypocrisy – marketing.  Marketing  covers all evils, and the antipode, marketing also can suggest and  impart evils.  In society, a free market has been giving to alcohol.   Until recently, tobacco also had a free reign on what it was allowed to  do.  I believe with no factual checking whatsoever, that tobacco once  sponsored the Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards.  This is how dangerous  marketing is.  It tarts up the morally questionable and makes it  acceptable without anyone actually noticing.  Try and shop for a  birthday card that has not got a reference to getting drunk.  Marketing  doesn’t just extend to big television adverts where tick follows tock  follows tick follows tock, no, marketing also accounts for a turn of  phrase.  “I could murder a drink”, “Bottoms up” and so on.  Alcohol has  been marketed to the point of societal saturation.  Despite being one  the greatest harms of society and accounting for a heavy burden on the  NHS, around 10 000 direct deaths a year, and an arguably greater risk of  mental illness than cannabis, all is forgiven because of that damn  bear.  Follow the bear… to casualty, the psych ward?  Follow him to the  grave, Hades even?  What?!  Nothing makes sense.
  
 It is a clever world where such a killer can be dressed up to mask  all sins.  It is very curious that cannabis suffers from the opposite  syndrome.  With comparatively little to show for the harms, cannabis is a  full and unmitigated evil.  How can this be when a substance that can’t  kill you is demonised in such a manner when alcohol is a guilty little  pleasure?  Yup, one word again; marketing.  It’s no coincidence that we  have a hypocritical and juxtaposed position of drugs, someone has had  the job of controlling the output of image.
  
  
 In the U.S, cannabis has a massive subculture, we have pot associated  films, celebrities, programmes, jokes.  Pot is mainstream, only  politics holds back the place of legitimacy that is warranted.  In the  UK, we have an extensive underground culture.  As a result, cannabis in  generic terms is dirty and morally illicit.  Our commentaries of  cannabis come from programmes such as Shameless, Skins and the seedier  side of life.  Put a joint in the hands of Rita from the cabin in  Coronation Street, and you will have cannabis accepted before you can  say; “Sponsored by Harvey’s Furniture Store”.
  
 Any portrayal of cannabis on UK television is of the down and out;  the dregs of society.  When Phil Mitchell was going through his crack  whore phase, somehow cannabis was brought into the fray.  He’s also a  raging alcoholic, but the story didn’t feel the need to bring that part  into correlation when he was doing ’drugs’ – no, generic and lazy  concepts were adhered to fully.  Further addressing the London soap  opera; the Comic Relief special of Eastenders focused on the sex  industry and female exploitation.  How did they portray the depraved  ethics of this life?  Yes, you know where I’m going don’t you.  It went  something like this – bearing in mind I never watch Eastenders you  understand?!
  
 The scene: a squalid house party with two girls and 20 men – you  do the math!
  
 Girl 1 – “Glad you’re here, it lightens the load.”
 Girl 2 – “What?”
 Girl 1 – “You know.  Want some of this?”  (holds up a lit spliff  to convey how risqué and depraved the party is)
 Girl 2 – “Oh god no, I don’t do that stuff, I’ll stick with this,  it’s safe” (holds up a can of beer and we all thank the lord she’s not  into drugs)
 Girl 1 – “Go on, it’ll take the edge off”  (offers spliff once  more, and we’re all shocked as a viewing audience)
 Girl 2 – “No, honest, I don’t want to take my chances with that  stuff.
  
 I think they then went on to talk about golf, the Russian revolution,  and Steven Fry somehow popped up surprisingly, but I’m still not too  sure my Mum didn’t turn over to QI, so I’ll stop at this point.
  
 You see my point though, to transmit a message – no matter how  hideously invalid – is acceptable through the medium of popular  television; all the thought process needed for the average person.  The  malaise of morals is forgivable simply because marketing has done a good  job.  Cannabis is simply a whipping boy.
  
 On a higher level, cannabis has also been subjected to a marketing  ploy.
  
  
  
 In 2004, cannabis was downgraded to class C; many thought we were on  the road to full reform.  David Blunkett and his dog were running the  Home Office.  All was well, Tony Blair had a song out; he did a duet  with D’Ream, and Bucksfizz were making a comeback.  The details are a  bit hazy as you can see, but the basic notion of my point is correct;  cannabis was going mainstream.  So, how did we go back a stage in  cannabis reform?  Why the reclassification back to class B under Comrade  Brown’s regime?  Because, (don’t make me say it again!) marketing came  into play.  The media battle against cannabis was lost.  The Independent  newspaper had a front page in print proclaiming the need for cannabis  ‘legalisation’.  We all assumed Blair was a cheeky toker, he had Noel  Gallagher round for tea and we knew they were blazing up.  So how did  the marketing campaign change our perspective of cannabis?  Simple,  cannabis was dead, say hello to my little friend Skunk.
  
  
 Nowadays, we only deal in terms of skunk.  Skunk has fully replaced  cannabis as a conceptual issue.  Skunk is of course the “super strength  cousin” of cannabis.  Dangerously high in potency – sometimes 40 times  stronger than the 60’s if you believe the Daily Mail.  The Independent  retracted their front page and declared how wrong they were and that  they were about to embark on penance by severing their limbs by method  of paper cut.
  
  
  
 Dr. Ben Goldacre has put out an exquisite piece on the infamous  Independent retraction, it’s well worth a read, please do visit Bad  Science and look up his cannabis articles.  The potency of skunk, and  related harms, gave free reign to governments of past and present to do  whatever they jolly well feel like with regards to policy; and they have  done exactly that.  With no evidence, no scientific studies and nothing  more than their own opinions, the allowance for keeping skunk as an  illicit substance due to the conceived harms is in full effect.  You’ve  got to hand it to the spin doctors, they’ve done their jobs.  Even the  word ‘skunk’ sounds dirty; it is all cleverly designed to sway lazy  minds.
  
 Of course, those that know cannabis know that skunk is simply bad  quality cannabis that has adulterants, the incorrect balance of  cannabinoids, and has probably been grown by untrained monkeys with a PH  stick.  The connoisseurs’ version of skunk differs to that of politics’  and media.
  
 Bearing in mind the full justification of action is now on the  shoulders of skunk due to the increased potency, it was somewhat amusing  – or should that be bemusing – that on the 4th of April  2011, a full & clear admittance was given by James Brokenshire that  we actually have no idea on the measured potency of skunk.  There are no  records prior to 1995 on the marked potency of cannabis.  What does  this mean?  Well, in my day we used to term this as a “chin on” – in  more standard terminology, successive governments are now on record as  telling a few fibs.  We can all speculate on the increased potency of  cannabis, but to legislate on this alone, and to have no evidence of the  claims, well, this is not cricket.  In fact, this is damn right  dangerous.  Any other subject matter – if we were to catch our  government out making false claims – we would have full rights to an  investigation and answers.  In this debate?  Well, they’re allowed to  get away with whatever their opinions tell them at any given day.  It  doesn’t matter what they can prove, it only matters what they can sell.   Marketing 101.
  
 To change the answers, you have to change the questions.  The war has  waged on the ‘legalisation’ of cannabis for decades, and we’re  stalemate.  Well, that’s not true is it, we’ve actually regressed.   Marketing has won the war on the government’s side.  If progression is  actually wanted within this debate, then ‘we’ have to start asking our  own questions and learning from past marketing failures and successes.   If skunk has won the negative war, then prohibition can trump it, if  cannabis is dirty, maybe marijuana is the way to go I ponder aloud.
  
 The position of the government is actually the harder position to  maintain, as we all know by now, they have no basis of argument and only  subjective abuse of power accounts for their action.  Cannabis remains  an illicit substance for no actual reason.  We’ve already won this  debate, we just have to market it correctly to get the full and correct  messages across.
  
 Personally speaking, I no longer feel the need to defend cannabis as a  concept, I field the discussion on the harms of prohibition, and ask;  how does the current law help, with decades to account for itself, how  has the law succeeded in controlling cannabis?  There are no answers for  these questions, and it has not failed to stump the hardiest of  prohibitionists.  I’m by no means saying I’m a good debater, or even a  mass debater (obvious gag alert once more) – but I have a basic grasp of  marketing, and I know it starts and ends with a projection of  message/image.  The message of prohibition needs focus, defending  cannabis in its generic form has limited appeal.
  
 Right, having said all that, I have a Unicorn to go see; we have a  bear to follow.  I’ll see you all in the Dragons’ Den!